May I please have some F*ck Fish

Cao = Grass

Cao = F*ck

The difference between the pronunciations of these is imperceptibly small. So once I tried to order grass fish at a restaurant and everyone at the table laughed at me. It gets worse; one of my colleague's last names is Cao. He was too polite to tell me that I keep miss pronouncing his name. Now I am just too afraid of ever saying his name. Cao=F*ck is a very strong word. Chinese people don't use it often.

Another one,

Didi = brother

Da = big

My logical conclusion: da did = big brother.

Well, as it turns out logic does not apply here. So "wo shi da didi" means "I am a big penis" and not "I am the oldest brother". There is a different word for big brother. It is "gege".

Once I learn Chinese I may have to move out of Beijing because I will have totally ruined my reputation by then.

Oh well, I tried to make more fun at myself by repeating "wo shi da didi" to my friends. They all thought it was hilarious.Publish